Comfort Food

Comfort Food - Kitty Thomas "Monsters aren't supposed to be beautiful. It's the rule."Yeah, I am giving this 5 stars, I don't think I could give it any less. I am still in a state of shock and awe having just finished this book. I think the world that Kitty Thomas has dragged me in was dark, twisted, ultimately fucked up (no better way to say it) but at the same dare I say "magical" and beautiful for lack of a better word. I think I may have a tinge of Stockholm Syndrome for the story. Comfort Food comes with a disclaimer, I suggest you read it and take it seriously. I don't know if saying I liked this book makes me just as twisted as the story itself. It wasn't an easy read at all for the subject matter but it wasn't a book I could put down either. Once again my intellect, morals and ethics are challenged and I am made to question just what is normal and acceptable. ”Today I found something beautiful and decided to break it. I wanted to see it shatter in my hand and crumble at my feet. Her name is Emily Vargas. She’s bright and educated and stunning. Articulate. She’ll want someone to talk to her.”Emily let her guard down, forgot what she was supposed to do and what not to do and gets kidnapped. She wakes up in darkness, blindfolded, bound to a chair and meets her captor who will not speak to her though she craves the connection. I unintentionally went method reading with this book and read it in silence. Her captor does not speak but Emily learns the language of communication she needs for survival. Is this what most of us would do? How would you know? "Could this weak, helpless creature really be me? I'd spent the past five years giving speeches on empowerment and self-improvement and here I was, reduced to this and so quickly.""To distract myself, to move myself out of this plane of existence and into another, one where I was free. The cell was a perfect stage, plenty of room to piroutte and tour jete across it."The ballet dancing was almost the most disturbing part of this book for me. It had the feel of a Twilight Zone episode and made me feel as if Emily was in a music box; a figurine on a post twirling around and around as long as it was wound and the music played. The transition from the first person to the third during anything physical was interesting. It is as if weren't happening to her and later the therapist echoes the same thoughts. I had the feeling that we were in fact reading Emily's journal that she kept mixed with the censored one for the therapist as the actual story. There were times where I had to put the book down and remind myself this was not an actual reenactment but a work of fiction. I must give kudos to the author for delivering that mind trip.There was so much to this book that it is hard to verbalize or review without giving it all away. I walked on the dark side and thank goodness the light was there when I was done. While the story was twisted from the beginning, the end had my jaw on the floor."I know you'll never be able to understand me making this choice. I know you'll all believe it was a sick mind that led me to it, that no person in their right mind would do what I've done. Maybe that's the truth of it. Or maybe I'm just stronger than you."Comfort Food is not an easy read, nor is it a romance. The disclaimer is a true warning. If you read it and feel a sense of dread and uneasiness, do not read it. If you like the challenge and the depth of the psyche that can make a person do what Master and Emily both do, read it.